Loud Boundaries: saying no and working three days a week
Tas Bober on escaping tech burnout, saying no to clients, and building her business around a three day work week to protect her mental health.
Tas Bober calls herself a human chameleon. She’s half Thai, half Indian, grew up in India, and has lived in seven cities across three countries. Her mom calls her tactlessly honest, a trait she’s turned into a personal brand. Her old life in traditional B2B was slow. Her new life in tech SaaS was a race car, working 50 to 60 hours a week until she crashed and burned.
The burnout was so bad she barely remembers her daughter between the ages of two and four. She was just trying to get to bedtime so she could work more. That realization was a turning point. She started going to therapy, which she calls mental flossing, and got on Zoloft, which she calls adult fruit snacks. It all helped her learn to trust her gut again.
Now she runs her own business with what she calls loud boundaries. She works a three day week to optimize for the life part of the work life equation. She says no to prospects who have the budget but don't pass the vibe check. And when she got too busy, she hired help instead of giving up more time with her son. It’s never worth it.
“I fought so much for dumb stuff, like senior director. What does that even fucking mean? It just means nothing.”
Notes
- She describes her burnout in tech as working 50 to 60 hours a week at multiple jobs.
- She works a three day week to optimize for the 'life part' and spends two other days with her son.
- She will say no to a client, even if they have the budget, if her gut says they will be a pain in the ass.
- Because of burnout, she feels she missed everything that happened with her daughter from 18 months to four and a half years old.